Stop Competing Yourself with Others & Start Learning: Here’s How

I always wanted a perfect life. Even after marriage and having children, I kept struggling to achieve something more and more. There is a man in my neighbors who is very lucky. He got the job which I desired for a long time. Now, he has the best house in our town—all I want to get the same what he has because he is better than me. I never feel good enough because that man steals all the joy in my life.

Most of the time, I usually overwork to keep my children and wife happy. While thinking of my neighbor’s luck, I wished to be like him. This thought motivates me to put more effort into my work. I never felt what happiness looks like. I desire to win, and I get scared of the fear of defeat. With every passing day, my stress does not reduce. Instead, I live in constant pressure. I think I will lose, and this feeling makes me angrier and more depressed.

If you are like me and compare yourself with others, you should reframe the way you are thinking about the circumstances the next time you are tempted to believe someone else is better than you. Ask yourself these questions:

• What can I learn from this person?
• What information does that individual have that could be valuable to me?
• What area of expertise, ideas, or knowledge does this person have that could be helpful to me?

Instead of judging people, stay curious. Admit that every person has a different skill, and you may get benefit from learning something from them. Look for the chances to learn, and you will begin to see that other people are not substantially worse or better than you – they are only different.